Repentance Rituals + Cancel Culture

On the loss of ritual within militant secularism, and turning to IG creators as prophets of our own privately curated religion.

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As I struck my chest with every sin I read out loud on Yom Kippur last year, I thought about how hard it often is to say, "I've hurt people. I've acted selfishly. I've lied. I've been manipulative. I've said dumb shit that I wish I hadn’t said and thunk dumb shit I wish I hadn't thunk." But through this practice of saying, "I've done some shitty things," I recognize and come to peace with myself and my flaws.

Within militant secularism, we don’t often have these rituals nor the structures to contain them, that allow us to reflect on how we’ve hurt others, repair, and move forward, forgiving ourselves. We need these cycles, like a breath, inhale and exhale, so we can reset. We learn and get to let go.  As a result, there is no beginning, middle, and end, no expansion and contraction, only mounting harm and resentment, grudges held sometimes forever. Without these structures and without community in which to reflect together, this mounting harm breaks and causes blame and punishment, often as extreme as what we call Cancel Culture. All too often, those pointing the finger of blame are unwilling to reflect on the ways they, too, cause harm. "Those people who violate consent. Those people who cause harm. Those people who are racist, transphobic, sexist. They're the worst! I'm not like them."

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Unblocked: Moving through creative blocks with a self-consent practice starts 5/15.

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